September 2012
remember that time Lilo got real hood real fast and beat that white girl’s ass
i do
does your period ever come late and you start to wonder if you’re pregnant despite the fact the most intimate thing you’ve ever done is shake hands?
the number of times i thought i was the next virgin mary is alarming
August 2012
Harry Potter and It was Snape…wait no
Harry Potter and It’s Malfoy…wait no
Harry Potter and it was Sirius Black…wait no
Harry Potter and It was Voldemort
Harry Potter and fuck you I was right
Harry Potter and no it was definitely Snape this time
Harry Potter and shit, wrong again
it’s kinda funny how when you get older you start to enjoy the things you hated as a kid like taking naps and getting spanked
i cybered on omegle today
- You: hi
- Stranger: hey
- You: wanna cyber
- Stranger: Depends are you a girl? ;)
- You: ya
- Stranger: And okay then, you start?
- You: i come into ur bedroom
- You: and ur sleeping
- You: and i crawl under your blanket
- Stranger: I'm still asleep
- You: u feel me pulling down ur pants
- You: and u wake up and smile
- Stranger: I kiss you gently, still sleepy
- You: then i smile and open the scissors around your dick and snap them closed
- You: cutting off your penis
- Stranger: wait
- You: THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR CHEATING ON ME
- Stranger: Then what...?
- You: I HATE YOU
- Stranger: I didn't cheat
- You: you bleed to death in your bed
- Stranger: i didn't cheat on you. lets restart ok
- You: nobody ever knows what happened
- You: i flee to mexico with your Mercedes
- You: the end
- Stranger: I have a mercedes?
- You: not anymore faggot
- Your conversation partner has disconnected.